Originally published by Chamber of Merchants
“Oh, hello!”
I didn’t see you standing there! Look at me, in my baking apron!
I was just going over this interesting recipe for baking a Stock Market Record Rally.
Maybe you can give me hand? You’re a dear.
Let’s Start Baking!
Stock Market Rally November 2016
Step 1
While the Plunge Protection Team [PPT] keeps the S&P 500 and Nasdaq 100 unnaturally high, ensure no corrections take place, in case we burst a bubble or two!
Step 2
While the markets are churning, ensure a rumour surfaces between Saudi Arabia and Iran. They do go so well together!
Step 3
The recipe says we need to ensure the U.S Dollar stays high, even if economic indicators tend to deflate it. Use 1 Swiss Franc Crash that’s been thawing for about 12 months. Combine that with a fresh flash crash, preferably a British Pound’s worth to give the U.S Dollar that extra Al Pacino “Hooha!”
Step 4
Is the P.P.T still churning? Good!
Now let’s get some Vodk…We’re out of Vodka? We gave that up a decade ago. Hmmm.
I know, let’s just Put-in Russia into the mix and have a rumoured freeze with OPEC. Imagine that: Layers of best friends, all stuck together in an icy combination, in perfect harmony to make the dish less oily, although this may cause the dish to provoke headache and heartburn closer to December – use sparingly!
Step 5
Nuts! My butter fingers just can’t pick up those darn interest rates… Quick… before they scuttle…awa.. Nevermind.
Next time!
Step 6
Hmm… The U.S. Dollar seems to be sinking. Did you open the oven while I wasn’t looking?
Just jibing your ribs my kitchen compatriot! This dish is meant to fall a bit flat.
Step 6
Oh look at that! Syrupy Gold and Buttery Crude Goodness rising to the top. And with it, everything else. I guess that U.S Dollar sinking to the bottom is forcing all the economic goodness to the top! Even the emerging markets are asking if they’re invited to the meal. Of course they are!
What a buoyant and bountiful dish!
Step 7
Now that we’ve had a good feed, satisfied to our hearts’ content, let’s put our feet up.
That was hard work!
Anything good on the telly? Oh look…they’re voting in the U.S.A.
November already?!
The End
Thank you for letting me share a piece of my Election Rally Pie with you.
Please share a piece if you think it will keep fresh till November 
*Chewing while raising my eyebrow… The left eyebrow…The crazy eyebrow*
| the Merchant
Humbled by many. See you tomorrow on the ASX.